To Have The Dates In The Way You Want

Finding the person in our dreams is not an easy thing to do. Usually first dates goes weird, second dates are full of expectations. In other ones we also do a lot of mistakes. We either call too much or don’t call at all. We become too available or busy all the time. We go to a chic restaurant with wrong shoes, laugh hysterically to bad jokes, use our cell phone too much while dinner and we do countless “date crimes” all the time – usually without even knowing it.

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You probably know some of the rules that you should obey in your dates. But even with that attitude, if your dates are not in the way you want all the time, you may missing a point. Do you want to look at our DOs and DON’Ts list?


1-Give extra attention to look good and be in the place at the right time. Being late and looking bad may be misunderstood as you don’t care about the person that you are seeing.

2- Try to have fun on your dates. Of course your dates are the things that you should take seriously but it can become excited sometimes, but remember that dating someone should be an experience that you ought to have fun.

3-Make compliments to the person that you are with. People usually give a lot of time to be prepared for a date, and knowing that you didn’t do it for nothing is a good thing.

4-Be interested and interesting. Ask questions, share your experiences and give extra attention when your date is talking about something that she/he cares about.

5-If you don’t want to see your date again, tell this in a clear and honest way. If you lie just because you don’t have enough courage to say it may hurt your date.

6-Don’t listen to your friends, date only if you like the person that you are going to go out with. Getting your friend’s approval is nothing that you should count on.

7-Be positive even if your date didn’t go really well. You probably going to go out for couple of times until you meet the right person.

8-Make plans. Dating with someone for the first time is something requires energy and creativity, so make plans and make your date feel that you make organizations and plans about this date.

9-Be active about meeting new people. The person that you are looking for probably won’t come to your door and beg you for a date. You should be ready to meet with the right person, so be as active as you can and meet as many people as you can.

10-Be friends with the people who are positive and who have the similar thoughts with you. One of the benefits of dating with a new person is telling to your friends about your date.


1-Unless there is an emergency, don’t call, text or e-mail more than once in a day to people you just started seeing. If you look desperate to person that you are interested in, that wouldn’t be really good.

2-Don’t go out with people who are similar to people that hurted you in the past. We all tend to like people who are not right for us, but it is important for us to break this mechanism. Try to have healthy relationship with people who don’t humiliate you and make you feel bad.

3-Don’t be late to your date because it is rude. Make the person know that your plans have changed, in time and apologize for it.

4-Even if you think that your date won’t like one of your features, don’t lie to him/her. It’d be bad if a relationship that can change your life will end just because of a lie.

5-Don’t be too available. It doesn’t mean that you should play games but if you are available every night, then you are not giving enough attention to your family, friends and to yourself. People who have things to do and who are occupied are more attractive to people then others.

6-Don’t give a lot of information about yourself at the beginning. Sharing all of your secrets just on the second date may meet with a repulse.Don’t be scared to share but do it in the right time.

7-Don’t look at other people while you are on a date because it is inappropriate. Give full attention to the person that you meet, it is important.

8-Don’t be rude and don’t be drunk. Acting good is not important only on the first date, it is important all the time.

9-Don’t disregard your safety. Don’t leave the house without your cell phone and charge it before you leave. Tell your friends where are you going to go and when are you are going to come back. Your first date should be in public.

10-Don’t give your address and home number on first date.

11-Don’t go out with someone who is married. Because odds are really low about that person leaving her/his partner for you. You only help to lie, and betrayal by doing that. If you are married, leave your partner before you start to see someone else. If you are single don’t be the shoulder that someone cries on, you deserve to be with someone available.

Ernestina Chacko is a writer and a photographer. Before joining, she was a senior contributor at Bloomberg USA.